The More We Trust Ourselves...
A final lone run along the lanes of beautiful Buxted this morning, reminding me of so many runs over the years... Winding my way from village to village, clocking up the miles in training for the London marathon... Even running around them in the dark on cloudless nights, without a torch, my way lit by the moon and the stars...
I can remember the feeling of timelessness, rustling noises in the hedgerows, and the darkness lending itself to nothing ness, to the moment, the step I was in and the miles going by almost on the spot in one speck of time...
And I have been so glad to see all the staff who work here at Buxted Park, who have looked after us so well, three who I known from days gone by...
I suggested to James our breakfast waiter that he dance around the orangery for us this morning, maybe even shedding some clothing so that he could become an even more colourful feature in my blog than he already is, with his smiley warm greeting and willingness to make our breakfast a special occasion...
He laughed and said it was too early in the day for such things!
We have been looked after so well by all who work at Buxted Park...
Thank you all for making us part of your big family... We love staying with you and appreciate all you do.
It was so warm today that Nicky and I even worked together sitting out on the grass - Nicky and I met seven years ago following her reading my book 'Running to Learn'...
We reflected on the incredible journey during this passage of time, which in so many ways feels but a flash... I can remember vividly our first conversation... Which unbeknownst to us then, was the beginning of a never ending dialogue....
And now another week here has drawn to a close... A week of joy, a week with old friends and new, a week of love and connection that never ends, circles of friendship...
It resonates for me why we wear rings to symbolise the never ending circle of love and friendship that cannot be broken.
Nothing can actually be broken, because we can never be parted...
This is why our only responsibility is to heal the parts within us where we believe there is separation, disconnect, disharmony.
There would be no such thing if we were all whole within.
Discord and separation is simply a reflection of our own inner pain, and when we experience upset, loss, anger and pain in our relationships, it is always important to seek within for the answers...
There is no one to blame... Everything is ultimately to do with us, and it is only our own lessons that we must focus on.
This doesn't mean others are not playing their part of course, or that we should accept abusive, cruel, manipulative or controlling behaviours from another...
But it is still up to us to explore ourselves, our own energetic make up, our patterns... And when we heal our own pain then these behaviours cannot be a part of our experience...
My experience in relationship this week has been of connection and joy...
Re-connecting and being with people who have shared themselves with me, a space of trust and growth, as well as meeting new people willing to open to themselves in new ways.
In truth all relationship could be this, all spaces safe and an opportunity for healing...
We got hurt in disconnection and we heal in connection.
If we open ourselves to the understanding that healing and reconnection is always possible, then amazing things happen...
If we work on our own pain, we can witness transformation in the relationships all around us.
It empowers us to know that it is only we who can change... If we wait for others to change we unconsciously become part of the holding pattern...
When we move, everything moves around us...
The more we trust ourselves, the more we are free....