A Quest For Love...
This morning I ran up the hill behind our house alone, there was still some shade... I felt fit, I felt still... I find I cannot think much in the heat and with the extra effort of altitude, and so my runs have developed a surreal quality...
Anadi was at the top having driven to meet me...
We ran together uphill some more, in silence on the wide, stony, hot, dusty track, high up in the mountains.... Once the hill is done, the land is more undulating and lends itself to conversation. We talked, as we often do, of our deepening commitment to trusting... The flow, going with it...
Trusting in love....
And now, I have just learnt my three Greek words for the day...
It might seem slightly incongruous to be learning Greek whilst in Spain! However, I decided when we were in Corfu that I would like to learn a bit more than the smattering we had picked up... But, I only got around to actually starting when Amy downloaded the app for me last week!
One of my words today is Agapi which means Love...
My whole life's work has been about love... Learning about it and teaching it too; how to clear all that limits our own self love, and so enhances our ability to love one another...
When another of my 'love relationships' had come to an end... My sister Rosy's friend said about me,
'She is on a quest for love...' And she was right...
Not a quest for the 'happily ever after', although for quite awhile I was pursuing love in this romantic way! But on a quest for peace inside, a freedom to live as myself, free from any self hatred, which would then inevitably reflect in all my relationships...
The word also reminded me of when I was learning more about relationship through reading Harville Hendrix's books on the Imago Theory...
In essence the theory charts how when we dive into relationships and we are passionately 'in love', that this 'phase' is just that, a phase, that will eventually come to an end...
It is often referred to as 'the honeymoon period' or 'the romantic phase', and it is of course very believable, because we believe we have found happiness in another... Inevitably frustrations and conflicts arise, which can mean we become locked in a power struggle...
This can be small or huge; when small it can continue for a lifetime and a marriage survives the cycles, or perhaps two people end up living more separate lives... And if it is too huge separation often occurs....
I remember the word Agape being used for the deeper love. The love that can occur if, rather than stay in the power struggle, we commit to exploring what part of us are still hurt and unresolved, what we are bringing to the space that makes it unsafe and so contributes to this 'battle'...
If we both commit to this; then there is the possibility of a really deep love - Agape - the highest form of love...
I remember in Greek mythology that Agape, a mere mortal, had to perform three tasks to demonstrate her love was enough to be fit to marry the God Apollo...
I can't remember if she achieved them, and I can't find out by googling either...
However, my understanding of this agape love is unconditional love, a more godly love... But one that we can all aspire to, not just with our partner, or our friends and family but with everyone on the planet.
Paulo Coelho describes it thus...
"Agape is total love, the love that devours those that experience it. Whoever knows and experiences Agape sees that nothing else in this world is of any importance, only loving. This was the love that Jesus felt for humanity, and it was so great that it shook the stars and changed the course of man’s history.”
Nothing else in this world is of any importance, only loving...
